lump sump story about dian

holla everyone!!! assalamualaikum..

its friday again.. pejam celik pejam celik, dh nk smpai end of november. as i am very look forward for december, i do still hope the time can slow down a lil bit. tah la, kalo aku jadi masa aku pon pening. kjap suruh cpt kjap suruh slow. 

december ni aku akan start kje baru. yg kje skrg ni, sempat kje for 2 bln lebih je. i dont how its gonna be at the new place. location wise, lebih jauh n time wise, lebih advance dr skrg. i hope i can make it a habit to be at oasis damansara on time. im yet to discover hows the traffic's like pergi dan balik. i can imagine pergi but i cannot imagine balik. according to my adik who's currently doing his practical study at the club saujana, the traffic flow during after office hour is baddddd.. dayummmm..

anyway, senanye nk cite psl my bfeeding journey. dah setahun i bfeed dian. n its going to be setahun jgak dian had exclusive breast milk throughout her life. masa dian dlm hari hari tu ade jgak campur susu enfagrow a+. tp lps dh cukup sebulan, i determined to give her just breastmilk 100%. until now, i did it!

Alhamdulillah, Allah permudahkan perjalanan untuk supply only breastmilk to dian. i may not be able to do it without His will. knowing me, aku mmg xde sebarang effort or what so ever utk memperbanyak kan susu. i eat what i want i drink what i want. actually ade jgak la try minum choc drink lunatots tu. tp rase nye mcm xberapa nk ade beza je. 

mase bulan ke 2 hingga bulan 6/7 mcm tu mmg susu byk. smpai berlebih2 stok. lps tu i resigned n xde lg stok sbb xpam. mmg kalau kt rumah, liat btol nk pam susu. hishhhh.. bad mom. skrg, as i work in this current place, aku cume pam sekali je iaitu sblm blk. dlm pkul5 lebih jgak. tu pon aku cume dpt average 8oz. kalau bertuah sbb terminum air byk ke ape dpt la 9 or 10.

honestly, im ready to face the fact that dian may need to start accepting other milk than just mine. slalu kak umi cerita kalau hari dian byk minum susu, 8oz yg aku bekal kan tu xcukup. n sometimes dian kne minum botol utk tdo. so kak umi just isi air kosong dlm botol n dian minum smpai tertidur. kesian kan? sedih sgt bile cube nk byg kan. mcm sengkek sgt mak dian ni. kedekut! taik idong masin!

more or less a week to go until i start my new job which i consider to have lesser time to be spent with dian, aku mmg dh ade susu lactogen on stand by. actually its my nephew's but aku dh ckp dgn kaklin, in case dian may need to drink more milk, i mintak permission nk try test skit. sementara tu, pemerahan susu insyallah akan tetap diterus kan. 

weekend ni nk cube jgak perah susu mcm biase. bole la buat bekal skit2 utk dian kan. hopefully selagi masih boleh dian minum breastmilk, breastmilk la. susu lain,pilihan terakhir.

syukur sbb punya kesempatan bfeed anak. i really enjoy nursing dian. dpt belai her soft skin n play with those tiny little fingers adalah ultimate bless! kadang2 dian akan look at me in the eyes n i cant figure out what she had in mind but its pure pleasure. kadang2 die tepuk2 perut, gosok2 dahi, the best cuddle ever. dian xreti selak baju lg. mmg la style die minum tu pelbagai, but so far she wont do crazy action tricks bile ade org memandang ke ape. she's behaving well alhamdulillah.

in terms of health, syukur alhamdulillah, dian xpnah sakit yg teruk2 n berpanjangan. minor fever n flu ade but very minimal. tatau la kut itu side effect breastmilk or mmg rezeki dian berkesihatan baik. she's one active n happy baby. lebih byk gelak dari merengek. something that makes me smile every time. 

her appetite, sonang yo.. dian dh bole mkn nasik. kalo kt rumah mak aku, ape yg anak buah aku mimi tu mkn, itu la yg die mkn. kalo nasi dgn kicap n telur, nasik dgn kicap n telur la yg dian mkn. she's very simple. n i can tell that she love to eat nasi lemak n nasi ayam. mungkin sbb dua nasik tu flavoured kan. at the moment, dian dah ade 10 gigi nak masuk 12 sbb gigi depan atas die almost penuh. she has no problem with chewing sbb dah ade gigi geraham atas kat blkg.

besides walking fast and "buldozing" whatever she sees in front of her (not quite good at controlling her break system, yet) dian dh start ckp few words. die akan ckp "nak" bile die nak sesuatu. "taknak" bile taknak. n "lagi" when she want something more. n dian pon tau sebut ayah n tau pada siapa nk sebut ayah tu. n of cz la to her ayah kan. mak? not chet.. xpnah dgr pon die pggl aku mak. biase kalo die nk aku die merengek je. but ayah, byk kali die sebut. aku xkecik ati. die sebut ayah with the right meaning, nak, xnak n lagi with the right meanings pon aku dh seronok yg hamat. 

her current obsession, water. pantang woo tgk air. msti die nk gi bersiram. kalo kite ckp jom mandi, die akan dtg kt kite smbil tarik2 baju die. i bought her a small pool mase birthday die hari tu. n she just loveeeeeeee to be inside there. makin kite kate ok dah jom masuk, makin die baring2 dlm pool tu. even when the pool is empty, die akan duduk dlm pool tu.

im happy to see dian's development as it is. dian xobses to tablet computer, or any cartoon series. she just enjoy being herself. sometimes she sings, she dance, she laugh, ikut suke hati die. main sorg2 pon xpe. im in no hurry to see dian achieving anything ASAP. dulu mase aku kecik2 aku sonok je explore new things sndiri. mak aku busy kje. so kalo die cuti die bwk aku gi kompleks pkns naik bas mini. xde plak die train aku tgk flash cards ke ape. but again, its the quality time that matter. kalo anak happy and rase diappreciate, she'll learn faster in a happy n healthy way. but i realize, my method cant be implemented 100%. world nowadays is fast, tough, mean n cruel. so aku xnak dian ketinggalan. insyallah kalau mase dh tiba aku akan expose kan dian dgn ape2 yg aku rase necessary. skrg nk biar dian main dgn imaginasi.

all and all, i pray nothing but only the best for dian. whenever we are apart, i leaves dian to Allah. mohon tuhan lindungi n kasihani dia. she's everything to me now n i cant imagine a day without her smiles.