sayang anak timang-timang kan

jumuah mubarakah!

today nk ngadu pasal perasaan diri sendiri bile pk kan ttg anak sendiri. honestly, since dh jd mak ni emosi jadi cpt sgt tersentuh. i remembered listening to one of my boss's story about his illness. mmg begenang air mata. xbole control walaupun hakikat nye i fikir "xkan la gua nk nangis dpn boss kut?!" i've tried to hold back, tp xbole. same la kalo dgr cerita2 lain yg shocking, i mmg xbole tahan. sbb tu la, i mane tgk kisah arwah adik adam ape tu name die? video amah baling anak tu pon i xtgk. xpela, i tau perasaan mak ayah anak2 tu. tp i xpayah tgk pon xpe.

actually i started to trigger abt today's feeling pagi td. mase tu nak amik susu dian from the freezer utk dibawak ke rumah mak. i kire2 total tinggal 10botol je (sbb skrg i dh increase kan isipadu from 3oz to 4oz per bottle since demand dian dh meningkat) n for today's pnye kegunaan i stok kan 8 botol. tp mengenang kan stok beku ade 10 saje i started to ponder, what will happen to dian if suddenly anything bad happen to me? nauzubillah, i know.. just what if.. maka, i start la terpandang2 muke budak kecik tu. sayu rasenye.. mcmane la org bole sanggup buang anak tu. baby tu kan comel. nak buat ape pon xbole. unless la ko buang die reti pukul nyamuk sendiri, carik susu sndiri. ni diorg ape pon xreti. 

ok, back to dian. i noticed that dian skrg dh pandai knal mak die. skrg ni start la tekenang yg i sometimes marah die sbb nangis xtentu pasal. kesian kan.. tantah die sekadar nk bermanja. i cant imagine a day without her voice, her touch. so i pray real hard for god to not to keep us apart. mase tuka lampin dian smlm pon i terfikir, one day, she gonna grow up n get married. i bkn xkasi, but things are going to get change. n can i handle the changes then? allahualam.. skrg i dh paham perasaan mak2 yg menangis meraung bile anak diorg mati dlm accident ke ape bile tgk berita. i might do the same kalo bnde tu terjadi pada i. ya allah, tolong la pjg kan umur kami anak beranak.. 

even yesterday mase dlm kereta, otak i ni tetibe je terfikir yg i rase mcm xnak beranak lagi. sbb kesian kan dian. hahaha.. dian is my precious skrg ni. will do anythng for her. kalo bole xnk die sakit sikit pon. kecuali la kalo sakit for good kan. contoh mcm kalo kne cucuk tu, i always reminded her to stay calm cause its nothing. cume satu suntikan yg sekejap. so she got to be strong.

overall, im not a paranoid mom. dian dh merasa mcm2 such as honeystar, red velvet's cream and alhamdulillah die ok je. i xberniat buruk. i just nak kasi die rase mknan yg sedap. n nope, i bkn kasi die mkn. i kasi die rase ye.. rase.. cume itu la, i dont want anythng bad to happen to her. everytime buat susu dian (expressing myself) i akan start kan dgn doa. moga2 i bole catch up blk produce more stocks for dian. she's growing up with my milk so im proud of her. die berat ke ringan ke thats all because of my milk. i hope she likes it n can get all the benefit out of it. insyallah..

dian plak is an easy baby. so far dian xpnah demam. alhamdulillah.. die pon sgt mudah n stakat ni menerima ape yg kitorg buat dgn die tanpa merengek ke ape. contoh mcm pakai headband, unlike some babies i used to know, kadang2 xsuke letak pape kt kepala diorg tp alhamdulillah dian ok je. selagi org xcabut, selagi tu la die pakai. n that makes her even cuter. pakai safety belt kt stroller pon die redhooo je..  syukur anak ku xmenyusahkan.

glad that now dh pon pkul 2pm. berapa jam je lagi utk berjumpe blk dgn dian. lps tu esok cuti n hooray!!! more time to spend with dear dian.. *terus gembira pk kan esok*

i doa kan supaya sume mother daughter n mother son out there akan bersama2 mengerat kan silaturrahim bersama anak masing2. especially utk diri sndiri, even though berat dh over 8kg, i dont mind to carry her around where ever i go. she's more than any coach or LV or gucci. she's dian. made by god through me n husband. be proud of your own product. yeah oh yeah..

dian - made with love..

thursday ramble

assalamualaikum.. its thursday, spent half of the day in the meeting room jotting down some notes. bosan, sgt bosan.. just had my lunch of karipap. again, karipap. hari2 pon aku mkn karipap. tp karipap hari ni different. n nope, im not talking about those small standard size karipap yg jual 5 dua inggit tu.. normally i'll buy giant karipap at my office ni. its yummy, seriously.. its big, mengenyangkan dan sedap. pnah mkn karipap inti rase mcm satay? well, its here baby.. i get to eat it everyday! reason suke mkn karipap saje, sbb ianya handy. xkecah2. mkn pakai satu tgn je. pstu bole pura2 busy. ngeh2.. tp this morning mase otw to work, a banner with "karipap gedabak" written on it caught my attention. so hubs make a u-turn. yes, he knew about my passion on karipap since like ages ago. stall tu mmg jual karipap *duhh..* n gedabak *longer duhhhhhhh* besides the size, karipap yg dia jual tu pon comes with various flavor! ok, ini menarik.. i tgk ade perasa crab n cheese, macaroni n cheese, chicken, pizza, beef.. interesting kan? so i bought two. the regular chicken karipap n pizza karipap. hoihhh.. sedap i tell u.. dh la rm2.50 je satu. ko tggu bro.. esok aku gi beli lagi.. hehehe..

fuohhh.. pjg membebel pasal karipap.

NEXT!!!!

suami ku dh blk.. perasaan.. sgt gumbira!!! rasenye seperti hidup ku kembali bersinar. hahaha.. so last tuesday i took an annual leave semata sebab nk amik die kat airport. ok, tipu.. aku gi bwk dian check 3bln jgak. suppose our appointment 9hb hari tu tp doctor dian plak cuti so i decided to rearranged the appointment instead of taking the jab dari doctor lain. so, last tuesday it is.. al-kisah.. di demc, the mom yg kne timbang anak sendiri kt penimbang tu. dah 2kali buat so far masih goyang la kut2 mate ni kero xreti tgk number ke kan.. but i xla sekero itu.. alhamdulillah before this berat dian mmg increase 1kg a month. but last tuesday, the scale showed that dian's weight is 8.1kg. gulp.. *padahal mmg dh expect dh*. masuk jumpe doctor, memule die excited. pstu, die mcm xpercaya sbb dian baru 3bln. die pnye xpecaya smpai die pgi timbang sendiri kt luar. haaaa kau.. sah2 jarum tu benti kat 8.1. so now, its official. dian berberat 8.1kg dan berketinggian 65cm. rasenye i dh bole redhoo bahawa anak i bakal lebih besar dari i. according to the doctor dian is not fat or overweight. but still, her graph xsama dgn yg spatut nye. instead of the normal graph, graph dian narrow sebab kenaikan nye mendadak. but her health plus her BMI is perfectly normal. alhamdulillah..

eh chopp, td xhabis cite pon pasal kepulangan yg dinanti tu.. on tuesday, aku loner bwk triton suami ke airport. itu pon atas request si suami sndiri. drpd takut nk bwk kete lori tu, akhirnye berjaya jgak. msti suami ku bangga. keh2.. and at last, kete tu jd transport utk angkut air zam2.. berguna kan? perasaan nmpk suami kt airport, rase mcm menang motor (???) hahaha.. dh agak dh ia akan menjadi moment awkward. i just passed him by je sbb nk gi salam pak metua. smbil tu husband sibuk load brg dlm kete. pstu gi jumpe die cium tangan n thats it.. hidup berjalan seperti biase. anyway, bersyukur die selamat pulang. itu yg paling penting.

jadi, smpai disini la saje ye omelan utk hari ni.. boleh tahan pjg gak rase nye.. insyallah kalo ade pape yg best nk diupdate, i'll update. but most likely it'll b about dian, about my family. harap maaf kalau xmenarik perhatian anda.. =)

tepek gambar dian buat kenang-kenangan

independent mom

hi everyone, i am an independent mom. not yet a super mom tp cume sekadar mak yg single to raise her daughter without the assistant of her husband. i've been living 11days and 12nites without husband. tidak la selama mereka2 yg on LDR tp its long enough for me.

alhamdulillah, suami dpt rezeki utk ke tanah suci. i feel so happy for him. although die just pergi dgn family die (his parent n sisters, all 7 of them) without me n dian, i rase mcm berbaloi effort mereka sekeluarga dlm mencari rezeki selama ni. im grateful to know that they choose to go to the holy land instead of europe. im grateful mereka xlalai n xlupa dari mana asal rezeki mereka. syukur, sesyukur syukur syukur. hehehe.. insyallah husband kate kalo ade rezeki lagi n dian pon dh besar, die nak bawak kitorg plak utk kesana. yupp, our little family. semoga allah makbul kan doa nya n kabul kan pencarian rezeki kami. ameen..

sepemergian husband kesana, i stay with my mom. i owe my mom alot for helping me out most of the time. managing life with baby adalah susah. mcmane la kalau sorg2 kan.. tp i bertuah sbb mak adalah yg terbaikkk.. i sleep with her every nite. pagi2 i akan memacu kereta suami utk ke tempat kerja. mak will hold dian for me everytime i need my me time. syukur, dian pon xcranky. we occupied most of the days with family activities, like we went to my grandma's house in pj n sleep over for couple of nites, thank god there was a kenduri to attend n my days at the office were also pretty occupied n productive. 

communication with husband while he's at mekah was easy peasy. his hotel lengkap berwi-fi so we just video called each other bile rase rindu (n im the happiest wife bile he do most of the video calls) but the moment he left mekah for medina, our communication mcm susah skit. he only get to call me using his arab number. bayangkan la perasaan i everytime phone ring sambil number yg appear tu adalah international number yg pjg. melompat ok! but still, xpuas bile call biase2 saje. technical problem mcm conversation delay, suara pelahan tu membuat kan ku geram. i can feel that my husband is so far away. so we sms each other kalo nk ckp or update ape2 yg important. *sad*

about dian, so far she's ok. im glad she is. cume the nite azam nk ke medina tu dian mcm cranky skit. rupe2 nye bile husband call pagi tu to let me know that he've arrived, die ckp the whole nite die teringat kan dian. so, no wonder she's cranky too.. i feel so sad for both of them. i mean, thinking of their connection, mcm syahdu sgt. dah la kat medina husband kate tgh musim sejuk n he's feeling feverish. awww... poor my big baby.

ape2 pon, i rase mcm pemergian husband ni is a good exercise for us. ye la, slame ni xpnah berpisah. so bile jauh skit masing2 pon saling rindu each other. then, baru la terase mcm dihargai n disayangi. ohhh.. i feel like crying. now i know i've met my real true love. n kalau ditanye whether i nk berpisah lagi ke x, the answer will definitely be no walaupun semua nya berjalan lancar je spjg ketiadaan die.

n today, i cant wait to have him back. esok, i akan sambut die di KLIA. its gonna b an awkward moment i rase. but a happy moment, im sure..

dian : "ayah, dont leave me!!!"

me n dian's #1 hero.. *miss u much*

wish list

holla!!!! lame gile xupdate blog.. maaf, sibuk dgn kerja. sibuk dgn life. alhamdulillah, sedang menikmatinya to the fullest skrg.

i actually ade gak teringat nk update blog. tp xde topik plak yg nk dikongsi. my obsession, si dian medina of cz.. she is my drug. itu la perasaan bile dh ade anak. feed IG pon gambar dian semata. still blom get over her.. kalo ade sesape yg pnah terfikir "asik post gambo anak je.." dan seterusnya menyampah, i dont need ur judgement to be happy n it dont affect me even a bit with what u think about me.

baiklah, entry kali ni i selitkan sedikit ttg my daughter's milestone. she will be 3months on next tuesday. skrg, die dh pandai roll over dgn sndiri *clap2*, dh xpakai mitten *n smlm baru je scratch her own face while sleeping*, dh pandai giggle mcm baby2 comel tu, dh pandai membebel n, she no longer fit in 3months old baju *sad*. some of the clothes i dh pon put aside. skrg i dnt really fancy buying her clothes anymore unless there's occasion so she need to look cute. apart from that, i just prefer buying her toys n her needs..

ckp psl buying things, im currently look forward utk beli these 2 things. so, bnde 2 ni ade dlm wishlist aku.. tunggu azam blk umrah baru bole pk nk beli.

stroller pad

since stroller dian skrg xber pad so i kesian dgn die. rasenye quinny zapp tu xla keras mane tp mcm xbest je tgk die xterasa empok.. ushar gak stroller pad yg murah2. mcm yg dari babylove pnye, tp smcm xlawa plak. bekenan jj cole tp rase cam utk baby2 sgt. dian dh makin besar so i dont think it will suit her.. last2 suke dgn maclaren pnye stroller pad. tgk features pon mcm bole ngam je dgn zapp.. tp harga die la plak skit mahal.. rm100 ++ for a stroller pad? need further negotiation dgn hubby.

paling murah jual kt mybbstore.com tp design die xlawo. rm103. hurm.. nnt kite usulkan ke husband.

diono - stroller roller

discovered psl stroller roller ni smlm mase meeting (nmpk sgt xfocus pada meeting). its quite pricy but i think its useful utk pengguna quinny zapp xtra cam i.

im sure most mummy or excited-mummy-to-be tau yg quinny zapp xtra ni akan menjadi 2pcs bile dilipat. yes, i hate it too. it'll become a burden kalau kite nk maneuver bnde alah ni seorg diri especially dgn anak kecik lg montel. but as long as hubs or someone is by ur side, rasenye xsusah sgt. the frame, indeed is small. but the seat tu sedikit besar to me. since hubs is driving a 4x4, so i dont see having a big trunk at the back is a good thing utk kami humban kan stroller tu utk kemana2. sudahnye, kami terpaksa pinjam kereta spare family husband kalo nk keluar sbb xnk stroller tu melayang2 dlm trunk atau terpaksa diletak kt seat blkg n end up susah nk letak brg2 lain kalo kami nk bershopping skit. 

so back to the stroller roller by diono.. 

saw it at littlewhiz pricing at RM197.90. to me its practical. kalo nk simpan stroller kt rumah dlm ini pon senang so xde la stroller tu terseparate plus it can keep the stroller clean from dust. dgn stroller roller ni, baru la nampak sinar yg i dont need to buy another stroller kalo nk travel with airplane (tp, bilenye nk travel naik airplane pon) just in case. besides quinny zapp with or without xtra, this roller stroller can also fit peg-perrego, maclaren, n most of other umbrella folded stroller. senang kan?

so, itu la dua bende yg currently i sgt look forward utk beli.. kalau la i berjaya beli, i'll share it here, dont worry..

till then guys..

happy weekend!!!